2010

It would seem we have entered the final day of 2010. 2010... 2010, man. There's just so much to say about this year, I don't know where to begin. Ahem, I'd best grab some Mountain Dew for this one.

I can say with quite a bit of certainty that 2010 was by far the most eventful year of my entire life thus far. Consequently, it was also the second worst year of my life. (First prize still goes to 2006, which will be spoken of at a different time. Or not at all, that's fine with me.)

Logically speaking, I should start with January. Oh my God, was that only a year ago? It seems like an eternity. I actually have to look back at my old blog posts to remember, how sad is that?

The year started with Winter intersession, an optional 6 week long session at my college in which students can take classes in half the amount of time they normally would. I was foolish enough to enroll for it. My memory of those first couple months is pretty hazy, as I got minimal sleep, loads of stress, and a good ol' fashioned cold.

Life progressed, I turned 19, I had a few laughs with friends, I failed some classes, I took a trip to Boston, etc. It sounds like my spring was pretty eventful, doesn't it? But looking back I barely remember it. No, the true highlight of this year was the summer.

Perhaps I should correct myself, the insanity started sometime in May or so. I suddenly had commitments. Granted these commitments were playing Dungeons & Dragons and meetings for a cosplay group, but still, it was the first time I'd had any weekly commitments since... since... EVER. Things were moving along smoothly, I had a nice balance of things to do and time in which to do it... for about a month.

When my group of friends - half of whom were attending college out of state - reassembled for the summer, they wanted to hang out all the time. Okay. As did the other group of friends I had managed to attain. Uh oh. Oh, and did I mention I had three online classes for the summer? Uhhhhh, this isn't looking good. And on top of the many excursions, the friend drama, the family drama, and - OHMYGODICAN'THANDLETHIS!!!

Yeaaaaah. It was an amazing summer, with some unforgettable memories, but GEEZ, I've never been so exhausted in my life.

Things slowed down a bit for the latter part of the year, but not by much. There was the good: I made quite a few more friends, entered my first relationship, started another cosplay group, made a lot of good memories, and even started hanging out more often on campus... because it was fun. And there was the bad: family issues - some concerning my mothers health, some concerning strained relationships - became even more stressful, my grades got progressively worse, and I found out that one of my best friends is moving across the country in January.

So much happened... I still have a hard time wrapping my mind around the thought that... it's over. 2010 is finally over. Well, almost.

By the way, I completed one out of my five goals for the year - to post on this blog on a regular basis. Go me.

Don't Quote Me On That

Today's prompt is "favorite quote", and sifting through my long list of favorite quotations on my Facebook profile, I find myself most drawn to this one: "You can't wait for inspiration. You have to go after it with a club." - Jack London

Why? Because as an artist/author/human being, I find this to be true on a daily basis. Inspiration is fleeting, and it's a pain to hang on to, beating it into submission is the only real option.

Here are a few of my other favorite quotes:

“Getting over a painful experience is much like crossing monkey bars. You have to let go at some point in order to move forward.” - C.S. Lewis

"Thank goodness I was never sent to school; it would have rubbed off some of the originality." - Beatrix Potter

"Whoever had decided that school should start so early in the morning and last all day long needed to be hunted down and forced to watch hours of educational television without the aid of caffeine." - Vladimir Tod

"I am living proof that it is possible to profit from being a high school freak." - Meg Cabot

And then, just for the lols, I throw in one of my own quotes:

"Nerdiness is not defined by what you love, but how you love it." - Holly Van Leer

Is it sad that I love my own quotes?

LAAAAAA

No comment on the rubber band thing...

Anyway, I am currently undertaking a different kind of battle, that is, losing my voice. Now, normally my singing voice sounds like a cross between Amy Lee and Taylor Swift. Right now, however? I'd say it's along the lines of a lawn mower running over a 67 year old smoker with asthma.

While this may not SOUND (haha, pun... kinda) like dramatic tragedy, it is for me. Not only did I have to do several scenes for the cosplay show without my voice, but I have a choir concert this Wednesday as well... Yeeeeah.

Wish me luck?

Carry On, Carry On

My cosplay consumed life continues to press on. Though I suppose I should be thankful for the distraction. Aside from the filming for the cosplay group(s) I'm in - http://www.youtube.com/user/OtakuClanDiaries - I've also been posting a few videos of my own - http://www.youtube.com/user/MeahowX. Nothing too interesting, but, y'know, it's a start.

Anyway, other than that, there isn't really anything interesting going on in life right now. Not to say all the drama died down, it's still there, but this is what you'd call a period of waiting. Waiting to see what happens, both on the family and friend front. (Though the former is far more significant.)

While there's the potential for some major life changes to be going on, I doubt such things will actually happen. We'll see, I suppose. Until then, I'm going to carry on as usual.

I Really Should Sleep More

Well, if you haven't figured it out by now, an extended period of time without blog posts is a sign that life is either going great, or down the tubes. This past week, it happened to be the latter. Aside from the usual annoyances - dealing with school, my friends and their drama, not getting sleep, et. - my mother was sick.

Not cough cough sneeze sneeze sick either. Thankfully, she's going to be alright, though the whole thing sent my stress levels through the roof. Saturday, in particular, drove me insane. (It didn't help that I was fed up with more than just a few people.)

Anyway, things are cooling off for the time being, and life should be back on track by next Monday. (Hopefully sooner, but I'm being realistic here.)

...I really should go to sleep.

Blah, Blah, Blah

I am so done with all this school nonsense. Too bad I still have four more years of this crap.

Anyway, I am super tired lately, this may or may not have something to do with waking up at 8 am every morning >.>

Nothing interesting has been going on here, there are just a lot of tedious tasks that I need to finish start. Aaaaand, of course, rather than doing them, I am sitting here being lazy. Surprise, surprise.

Back in Blonde

Who said blondes have more fun? Thanks to temporary hair dye, I was a redhead (this is a rarity, for those who don't know I'm a natural blonde) for the past two days - for a cosplay, of course - and I had tons of fun.

All joking aside, I'm more pumped up than ever for future cosplay. Not, mind you, motivated enough to get a job.

I'm not really sure what this blog post is about anymore, I'm just trying to figure out what to do with the extra time I'll have since I was dropped from one of my classes. Work on my art? My music? My writing? My room?

Ugh, an additional three hours a day is NOT enough to accomplish all that.

I need to learn how to budget time. Or something like that. I dunno.

.....

The first week of school was horrific, but today really took the cake. I don't even know what to say.

So Long Summer

Earlier today, one of my friends mentioned this being the best summer of her life, and... you know what? It was the best summer of my life. Or, at least, the best summer since I started high school, half a decade ago.

Not only have I actually acquired a social life - well, as much of one as a nerd can have - but I accomplished things. Also, a major hurdle, I finally moved on with my life. I finally let go of a lot of the issues I'd been bogged down with, and I must say, it's quite a relief.

I was ridiculously busy, barely got any sleep, and got frustrated more than a few times with people, but I had fun. I can honestly say, I got the most out of this summer, and accept the fact that it's over. Don't get me wrong, I really, really, don't want to start school on Monday, but this is a better state than I am normally in prior to the beginning of a semester.

Come to think of it... my first post on this blog was at the start of a semester. Considering how differently things turned out from what I had hoped for in that post... I'd rather not think too much about what might happen. I'm just going to embrace my impulsive nature, and wing it.

Hmmm...

This past weekend... it was epic yet insanely stressful at the same time. I'm not really sure what to think.

One last week before Fall semester begins. I'll probably cram as much as possible into the remaining time, rather than get the rest I need. Oh well, at list I'm consistent.

Random Thoughts

So, it's been awhile since I last wrote a remotely interesting blog post. I'd apologize, but there are so few of you that actually read this, there's really no point.

Is it just me, or has this past year been backwards? I mean, generally, I'm somewhat busy during the school year, and then completely bored during the summer. The past few semesters, I've been bored out of my mind with absolutely NOTHING to do. (See blog posts prior to May.) Then, all of a sudden it's May and my schedule is jam packed. Is this what college is like? No, I don't think so. It's probably just me.

Well, anyway, all this contemplation - or rather, random thinking - was brought on by looking at my schedule for the upcoming season. It'll be my first semester with absolutely NO online classes. (Horrifying isn't it?) I'll be taking two required classes - English and Algebra - and two for fun/units classes - Drawing and Choir. On top of the fact that I really, really need to do well this Fall - I won't go into the details, but let's just say my GPA isn't at it's best right now - I still have my cosplay group meetings every week, D&D every week, AND Guild Wars 2 comes out this November as well. (I know, a lot of you non-gamers out there are rolling your eyes at me, but GW2 is serious business.)

Because of all of this, I probably won't be participating in NaNoWriMo this year. (Or maybe I will and just fail miserably. Again.)

Anyway, I digress. As I look toward the daunting season ahead, I realize I should take advantage of the less than three weeks I have left. What does this mean? As soon as I finish cleaning my room - my current task at hand - I will be gaming like there's no tomorrow. Yes, that is my idea of a productive summer. Bite me.

Progress?

So, we're about half-way through the summer - technically halfway between June 9th and August 30th would be the around 19th or so, but whatever - and I decided to check up on my To Do list for the summer. (Thought I'd forgotten, huh? Well, I did, but I just remembered again.) For a recap, here's what was on the list:

- Figure out why I'm going to college.

- Learn at least 3 more songs on guitar.

- Clean my room.

- Do well in my summer classes.

- Go on an adventure.

- Post at least 15 drawings.

- Finish at least one video game.

- Write at least one story/fanfiction.

- Do a random favor for a friend. This was actually REALLY easy.

- Watch at least 5 movies.

- Read at least 5 books.

- Continue to blog regularly.

I'm not quite half through the list, but that's alright. I've at least done some of it. As far as drawing goes, I'm about 1/3 of the way finished with that goal. With the video game, I've started plenty, I just... you know... have to finish one of them. The story I actually completely forgot about. I'm thinking of doing a Fullmetal Alchemist post-manga, EdXWinry oneshot. Possibly.

"Do well in my summer classes" is a bit more difficult to gauge until final grades are out. (That's still two or three weeks from now.) I haven't been practicing guitar much, as I am a lazy bum. Same goes for the room cleaning.

Then there's the one goal. The big, fat, ambiguous one. Yeah, figuring out why I'm in college. I don't know if I'll ever reach that one. I guess it's becoming clearer why I'm here, but it'd be nice to have a real reason - something beyond the fact that I don't want a job yet.

Oh well, either way, I'm getting somewhere. Maybe I should do these to do list things every season? I mean, obviously it's more effective than "I SHOULD DRAW MORE" or "SOME DAY I WANNA FINISH THIS GAME." Just saying.

Something I *do* absolutely HAVE to do is get back on a somewhat diurnal schedule. Especially if I plan on taking traditional - meaning NOT online - classes this Fall.

Schedules

Since starting college, I have not had any form of organization in my life, whatsoever. Part of this would be because my lack of traditional classes, and the other part being... well... I'm not very good at keeping schedules. I try, I really do, I just don't deal with structure very well.

On the other hand, I don't have a job, non-online classes, clubs, or any commitments of any kind. Why should I bother with any sort of order? I mean, is there anything wrong with waking up at 4pm and going to bed at 8am?

There isn't. This is what I tell myself, every time I climb into bed when the rest of the time zone is waking up.

C'est La Vie

My life, the incidents in my life, and myself are three separate entities. This is why I am able to love myself and my life - as a whole - and still write the following:

This sucks.

The past couple days, I mean. I'm not going to go into details, but there's a lot of contributors, school, family, my own stupidity, etc. But, whatever. I'm two essays and one final away from finishing spring semester, even if I don't have the best results, at least I made it through.

More or less.

Not as positive as my other recent posts, but c'est la vie.

Standardized Apathetic Testing

So, back in the days of MLK High School, I didn't have many aspirations beyond community college, and... well... I still don't XD

BUT, I did finally get around to taking my SAT for the first time. It was a piece of cake, as expected. I didn't really bother studying or stressing out. I figure if I did fine on my practice test, the real thing is no different, right?

Well, I suppose we'll find out in 2 to 4 weeks.

Oh, by the way, according to my calculator 2 x 2 x 2 = 13.

I never knew that.

The Game Of Life

Why am I in college? Seriously. Don't give me that "to gain more career opportunities" crap either. That's why people go to college. But why am I here? My parents gave me the college or move out ultimatum, but in the end, I could've gone out and gotten a job.

It's like when you're playing Life, the board game. At the beginning, you can either get a career or go to college, and I've forgotten why I chose this path. I think I'm going to add that to my list of what I want to do this summer, figure out why I put myself through this misery of higher education.

Actually, I'll make a list right now:

- Figure out why I'm going to college.

- Learn at least 3 more songs on guitar.

- Clean my room.

- Do well in my summer classes.

- Go on an adventure.

- Post at least 15 drawings.

- Finish at least one video game.

- Write at least one story/fanfiction.

- Do a random favor for a friend. This was actually REALLY easy.

- Watch at least 5 movies.

- Read at least 5 books.

- Continue to blog regularly.

Wow... that's a really long list.

What To Do With This Thing Called Life

So, I think I've solved my what should I major in dilemma. Kind of.

I'm going to apply to all the UC campuses in southern California with (more or less) different majors at each one. Then, I will be forced to choose from whichever ones I am accepted at. This narrows things down a bit.

Though it's not a legitimate solution, it does put off deciding what to do with my life a few extra months.

Wait, What?

Okay, I have been incredibly quiet lately, I know. I've been slightly-but-not-really busy with friends as of late. That's my excuse and I'm sticking by it.

I hung out with girls for the first time in the past month, and it was really odd. Don't get me wrong, it was tons of fun, the conversations just weren't what I was used to. I suppose I'm just more qualified to talk to guys rather than about them.

I have five classes now instead of two, and it's really not that different. Why is that? The only thing I'm really worried about is history and OMGIFORGOTTOBUYTHATBOOK!!!

Um.... yeeeah, I'd better go.

Feh

No updates for awhile, huh? Well, my bad luck continued - still haven't gotten my PC back yet, cellphone troubles, my alarm isn't waking me up, etc. - fabulous isn't it? On top of that, it was my birthday weekend, (actual birthday on March 4th) and the birthday party curse lived on. Nothing went as planned, and barely anyone ended up being able to come. Basically, it was the usual.

The good news is that:

1) I've lived to see 19.

2) I've got an A in sociology.

3) I finished 7 songs for FAWM.

That's about it. I could list off the thirty bad things, but I won't bother.

Here It Goes Again...

The weekend was absolutely FABULOUS, despite the accursed Valentines Day, which makes going back to school that much harder. I know a lot of people think of a new semester being a fresh start, but to me it's like reopening an old wound. I suppose that's rather pessimistic, but...

I suppose this attitude was only reinforced, thanks to the... er... poor results of my attempted "fresh start" in winter semester. Remember? Not that I was particularly optimistic then either, but I still wanted to try.

It has been pointed out to me that I will most likely NOT attain change with my current case of neophobia.

Unfortunately... I agree. Ah, well, perhaps I shall be able to analyze this more accurately tomorrow.